


The Sherlock BBC Chatroom Tales

by AlexaRaven



Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock BBC Chatroom, Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Chatting & Messaging, F/M, Het and Slash, Implied Pregnancy, Implied Relationships, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Multi, Sexual Tension, Sheriarty - Freeform, Sherlock BBC Chatroom - Freeform, Sherloliarty, Sherlolly - Freeform, T.A.R.D.I.S. - Freeform, The Tenth Doctor Makes an appearance in the chat room, molliarty - Freeform, mystrade
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-10-04
Updated: 2017-04-16
Packaged: 2018-04-24 08:34:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 10,942
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4912543
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlexaRaven/pseuds/AlexaRaven
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Chat room Sherlock BBC Style. That and just thought I'd try my hand at Chatroom stories.<br/>Enjoy!!!</p><p>For entertainment. Suppose to be crack or ooc. It's all for fun and no profit. Might make more if people like this. </p><p>Please leave a comment if you do.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

                                                                        [ ](http://s290.photobucket.com/user/DraconusMalfoy/media/collage_zpsqxv6nzjp.jpg.html)

* * *

 

Consulting Detective has created a chat room.

John H Watson has joined the chat

 

 

 

 

> Why are we doing this again? SH
> 
> It's a way for your fans to communicate with you.Besides it'll be a bit of good for people to see you more human and less machine like.
> 
> Fine! SH
> 
> You don't have to sign each post as SH this isn't text message.
> 
> Then how will people know it is me John? SH
> 
> Your picture?
> 
> Fine but you do know that anyone can put my picture up as their icon? SH
> 
> Alright you got me there, but seriously loosen up Sherlock!
> 
> This is dull and boring John. SH

The Pathologist has joined the chat

 

 

 

 

> Hi thanks for the invite guys!!! MH
> 
> Greetings Molly... SH
> 
> Hi Molly welcome. Glad you could make it!!
> 
> Thanks so what exactly are we doing here? MH
> 
> Losing brain cells and getting bored! SH
> 
> We decided to open a chat so anyone could talk to either Sherlock or I and ask questions.
> 
> Well that's good. So where is the other people? MH
> 
> Having intercourse or just doing something less boring with their lives. SH

Silver Fox has joined the chat

 

 

 

 

> Evening!
> 
> Hi Greg :) MH
> 
> Hi Greg,thank you for coming.
> 
> Hello Graham. SH
> 
> You know his name is not Graham Sherlock!
> 
> Who's name is not Graham? SH
> 
> Mine!
> 
> Sherlock be nice to Greg, Greg Lestrade you know?? MH
> 
> Ahh Lestrade yes. SH
> 
> Thanks Molly. So how is everyone?
> 
> Good
> 
> Good! MH
> 
> Bored!! SH

The British Government has joined the chat

 

 

 

 

> Evening everyone! MH
> 
> Who invited Mycroft?? SH
> 
> i did. Hi Myc!
> 
> Hello Gregory, Miss Hooper, John, brother mine.. MH
> 
> Sherlock behave yourself!! Hi Mycroft.
> 
> Hello Mr Holmes. MH

Mr Sex has joined the chat

 

 

 

 

> Who invited Moriarty?!?!?!?
> 
> I did might be less dull this way. SH
> 
> Hello Sherly! Bored to tears yet?? JM
> 
> Dull, John took my gun away I can't shoot the walls.SH
> 
> No sane person shoots walls when they are bored Sherlock!!
> 
> They don't also invite psychopaths to their chat rooms!!!
> 
> My chat room I can invite anyone I wish! SH
> 
> You could come to mine and it'd be less boring ;) JM
> 
> I could.. but what do you have to offer to keep me entertained? SH
> 
> I'm Mr Sex what do you think Sherly?? JM
> 
> You will not go to his flat Sherlock!!! MH
> 
> Stay out of my business brother mine!! SH
> 
> Your location is being traced as we speak Moriarty. MH
> 
> Ahh big brother is watching me. How dull! JM
> 
> i suppose I could blow up Parliament.. JM
> 
> You promised you wouldn't.. SH
> 
> You are lucky you are gorgeous! JM
> 
> Sherly come over when you are done being utterly bored! You know where i will be. JM
> 
> Catch you later then James. SH
> 
> You should hurry up or I'll start without you. JM
> 
> If you do I will tie you to the bed with my scarf and... SH
> 
> Oh God! You are not.. ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS???
> 
> No I'm fucking Jim. problem with that???
> 
> YES!!!!!!
> 
> YES!!!!!! GL
> 
> YES!!!!!!MH
> 
> Can i watch you? MH
> 
> I don't mind in fact you can join us..That is if Sherly doesn't mind? JM
> 
> That would be interesting.. Will be at your flat in ten minutes to pick you up Molly.SH
> 
> No need, sent a car for her already. JM
> 
> Best be on my way then. See you both shortly. SH

Consulting Detective has signed out.

 

 

 

 

> In the car be there in a few minutes Jim! MH
> 
> Can't wait Kitten! JM
> 
> Later guys!

The Pathologist has signed out.

 

 

 

 

> Later losers!!

Mr Sex has signed out.

 

 

 

 

> WTF WAS THAT??
> 
> Did you get the trace Myc? GL
> 
> That john was my brother officially losing his damn bloody mind. No, Gregory I didn't he covered his tracks very well. MH
> 
> Come to mine Gregory? MH
> 
> Alright. We can look over the intel and see if we can work on locating his whereabouts.GL
> 
> That or we could engage in coitus.. MH
> 
> Your car is here on my way baby! GL
> 
> See you soon darling MH

Silver fox has signed out.

 

 

 

 

> Am i the only one not fucking someone??
> 
>  Yes, Good night john. MH

The British Government has signed out.

 

 

 

 

> Damn and now I am all alone.. I should just sign out too I suppose..

Mary M has joined the chat

 

 

 

 

> Hello is anyone here?
> 
> Hello, this is John Watson.
> 
> Morstan, Mary Morstan. I am a big fan of your blog Mr Watson.
> 
> please call me John, and what seems to be the problem?
> 
> There is no problem really i just wanted to meet you John Watson.
> 
> Now if that  doesn't sound creepy! I am so sorry!!! I just think your cute and..
> 
> i didn't mean to write that, well I did but I didn't mean to send it!!
> 
> Would you like to get some coffee sometime Mary?
> 
> Yes, I think that would be alright.
> 
> How about right now?
> 
> Okay I just got off work at St Barts can we meet at the cafe across the street from there perhaps?
> 
> sure, wait you work at Barts?!?
> 
> I am a nurse.
> 
> Can you give me ten minutes as i am all the way over at Baker street?
> 
> It's a date then and see you then!!

Mary M has signed out.

John H Watson has signed out.

 


	2. Chapter 2

[                                                                       ](http://s290.photobucket.com/user/DraconusMalfoy/media/collage_zpsqxv6nzjp.jpg.html)

 

Consulting Detective has created a chat room.

John H Watson has joined the chat

 

 

 

>    I really don't understand why we have to do this again John! SH
> 
> Because last time you left and went to shag Moriarty and Molly!!
> 
> What I do with my partner and my Pathologist is not really your concern. SH
> 
> But it's dangerous and you won't talk to me about it!! Besides aren't I your partner?
> 
> My pathologist is not dangerous more like a kitten. Also yes my business partner as you are always telling people you are not homosexual. I meant of course my sexual partner, don't be dull John! SH
> 
> Besides, if I hadn't you wouldn't have met Mary would you have? SH
> 
> Don't you take credit for me meeting Mary because you were off shagging a dangerous criminal and a sweet innocent girl like Molly!

Mr Sex has joined the chat

 

 

 

>  Already have and you have no idea how not innocent Molly Hooper can be. SH
> 
> Gentlemen don't kiss and tell. But oh my back still hurts from all the scratches. Kitten she has claws you see.. JM
> 
> Piss off Moriarty!!
> 
> You might want to rephrase that Johnny boy! Because I am not as kind when i am pissed off! Things get blown up or people and really I did make a promise to not blow up people. JM
> 
> John don't be boring and dull and James, you also promised not to blow up buildings too as i recall. SH
> 
> Yes ok you got me. So where are all the goldfish? JM
> 
> Just that easy really?
> 
> I like the things he can do with his mouth as well as... JM
> 
> As well as what?!?
> 
> That would be telling.. Also your boringly normal why does it matter to you? JM
> 
> So where are all the people?? I have experiments I can be doing!! SH
> 
> Or me. JM
> 
> Please stop I don't want to hear about your sex life!!
> 
> That's why we normally go to Jim's or Molly's I am at least considerate enough not to make my flat mate suffer. Really we should get the rooms soundproofed. SH
> 
> Thank you again by the way for waking me up the way you did this morning. JM

 Mary M has joined the chat

 

 

>    Hello Mary.
> 
> John.xXx <3
> 
> Greetings Miss Morstan. SH
> 
> Hello Sherlock. You know you can call me Mary.
> 
> James Moriarty.. Hi!! JM
> 
> Hello, I am called Mary. So are you Sherlock's boyfriend?
> 
> i don't know if that is the right term but yes i am his partner. JM
> 
> yes he's my Boyfriend to use terms that are normal for most people. However it is more true that we are indeed partners engaging in sexual intercourse. SH
> 
> good for you both! He is quite handsome. Very cute!
> 
> Thank you. So you and john Watson hmmm?JM
> 
> Mary, Moriarty is not handsome and not cute!
> 
> Are you jealous? Because your very handsome John.
> 
> No, just he's evil!
> 
> So is a furby, but they are cute and evil little things.. SH
> 
> Sherly did you just compare me to a furby?JM
> 
> Yes problem? SH
> 
> what is a furby?
> 
> Here let me find a picture of one..  This is what a furby looks like.
> 
> cute <3 I want one can i get one and have it wear a Westwood suit?JM
> 
> Yes darling if I can get one with  Balstaff coat.. SH
> 
> ohh! Can it wear the purple shirt of sex like it's master?JM
> 
> Perhaps will have to see. we need to get one with a little doctors lab coat as well. SH
> 
> That thing is weird looking and it's eyes do they move?
> 
> Yes, i have one if you want to see next time we go out if you want to come up to my flat?
> 
> I think that would be fine..
> 
> Really you should go now John!! SH
> 
> Trying to get me out of the house so you can have sex with Moriarty?
> 
> Maybe we just want to play deductions,or have tea. It doesn't have to be all about sex you know??JM
> 
> Quite! SH
> 
> Well John is a cuddly bear after we've..
> 
> Mary!!!
> 
> oh that's so sweet.. JM

The Pathologist has joined the chat.

 

 

>   Molly likes to cuddle. SH
> 
> Yes she does. JM
> 
>  You both are snuggly bears and you know it. hi john,hi boys and is that you Mary?
> 
> yes hi Molls! Are you feeling any better?
> 
>   I think I'm coming down with the flu.
> 
> You didn't tell me you were sick are you okay kitten? JM
> 
> What are your symptoms and why are you on here chatting instead of resting? SH
> 
>  I'm fine really. Just felt a bit nauseous this morning is all. I feel fine now hungry even.
> 
> Have you seen a doctor?
> 
>  Jim, really I am fine and i am a doctor you know??
> 
> John go fix Molly!!!
> 
> What Sherlock?
> 
> John could you please give Molly a checkup as i assume she has not called and made an appointment with you. As I am all thumbs at caring for another person I know i would be rubbish at it and possibly make things worse. SH
> 
> Please?!? SH
> 
> Molly will you allow me to come and have a look at you?
> 
>  I will come see you tomorrow at the clinic. i promise but maybe the boys are right and i should rest. Goodnight.

 The Pathologist has signed out.

The British Government has Joined the chat.

 

 

 

>   If you want to know what Molly Hooper is doing then it would be best you go to her apartment and see. I assume that there is a reasoning for all these texts brother mine and Moriarty??? MH
> 
> Molly is unwell and I can't leave the chat room as this is suppose to be for meeting new clients.. It is bloody boring and i would be rather doing other things.
> 
> i could go by and check on her you know?? Except the fact I am away from England at the moment. I could send someone but I don't think I trust anyone else with doing so. I know you have surveillance Ice man just tell us what is she doing right now???
> 
> That would be an invasion of privacy..
> 
> So what you always have your big fat nose in everyone's business, why should this be any different???
> 
> it is not my concern brother mine. If you want to know go check on her yourself!!!!
> 
> If it were Graham I would do it for you!!!!
> 
> If it were Gregory I would already know and be at his side! MH
> 
> Who is Gregory? SH
> 
> He means DI Lestrade luv. JM
> 
> Ahh well regardless I would go over there and help Grah.. Greg out if you couldn't help him. Can you at least send Anthea over to check on her?? Please Crofty?? SH
> 
> I'm at Molly's apartment and she is going to rest. i have made her Chicken soup with stars and she says to tell you to stop bothering Mr Holmes and that she is fine. She doesn't have a fever so it's probably just something she ate is all. 
> 
> Thank you Mary. Satisfied Sherlock, Moriarty?
> 
> No, but i can't really go over there and check. JM
> 
> You really do care about her?
> 
> You know just because I am a psychopath doesn't mean i can't love right? It might not be the romantic squishy feelings most people get but I can love in my own way. JM
> 
> Likewise though you are not an average Psychopath as i am not a normal Sociopath. So makes perfect sense. SH
> 
> i think you both are just plain Autistic really and smart and just try to shock people.
> 
> Well six out of the seven doctors did say that Sherlock had high functioning Aspergers syndrome but he takes the word of the seventh. A bit of a quack the lot of them. Really he is a high functioning genius. MH
> 
> I have no idea however about James Moriarty except what his file has told me and yet it fits that both are genius's atleast more than the average goldfish. MH
> 
> Oh another brilliant man! Tell me did the psychologist have a field day with you as well Mr Holmes senior?
> 
> I am not incline to comment. MH

Consulting Detective has gone into private chat.

Mr Sex has gone into private chat.

 

 

>   Off they go into private chat doing who knows what!?!?!
> 
> Well excuse me I have to be off. I cannot say it was a pleasure except to perhaps meet your current girlfriend John. Send my regards to my brother and his.. well his criminal.
> 
> Please call me Mary.
> 
> Very well, have a good evening.

 The British Government has signed out.

* * *

Inside the private chat room with Sherlock and James.

 

 

 

> I assume you have deduced the possibility..
> 
> I have. i mean is it really a bad thing?
> 
> No, just unexpected. I suspect we shall know more in a few days if her menses are late.
> 
> I was serious before, I do love you Sherlock Holmes.
> 
> i know.
> 
> you did not just Han Solo me..
> 
> No i gave you a blow job this morning though. Wait is that a cultural reference to something?
> 
> You have never seen Star Wars?!?
> 
> No I have not.
> 
> My poor love, we need to watch them sometime when we have down time. But basically he's off to die and his girlfriend tells him she loves him and he says "I know.."
> 
> Do you need a confirmation then James?
> 
> No, because i know you love me Sherlock.
> 
> But you want me to say it.
> 
> When your ready yes, until then know that I know it's true.
> 
> I'm on my way home. Mind if i come over when the plane lands?
> 
> Bored being in Dublin i take it?
> 
> My brother's family is so boring.. I wish you had come with me though.
> 
> How about I go to yours?
> 
> Yes I'd like to see you.
> 
> I'll try and put it into my schedule..
> 
> We should go back now..

* * *

Back in the chat room..

Consulting Detective has returned to chat room

Mr Sex has returned to chat room

The Doctor has joined the chat.

 

 

> You really need to return your text messages Sherlock Holmes!
> 
> The answer is no, i am needed here.
> 
> The T.A.R.D.I.S. is a time machine I can have you come and bring you back the minute after we leave..
> 
> Time travel does not exist. Nor do aliens.
> 
> of course they do. i am one!
> 
> Then get into your spaceship and fly back to Venus or wherever you come from.
> 
> You're James Moriarty!!!!
> 
> Very good. Your the doctor and a time Lord from Galifrey correct??
> 
> Yes you know who i am ?!?!?!?
> 
> Yes, there is a brilliant tele show every Saturday night that follows the exploits of the Doctor..
> 
> Doctor Who!!!
> 
> Yes? And you are my lovely?
> 
> That is my girlfriend so piss off!
> 
> Really now you don't have to be vulgar! I am the Doctor.
> 
> Would you like me to prove it to you?
> 
> If you must go ahead...
> 
> Turn around what do you see?
> 
> i see.. john when did we get a retro vintage police box..?
> 
> Love are you serious???
> 
> No he's Sherlock and i am the doctor and you are...
> 
> Fine you made a box appear but doesn't mean your an alien...
> 
> I know how you can prove it..
> 
> Hold on let me get this straight.. if i am sensing and seeing correctly..
> 
> Yes, now would be good and so much more fun then.. OH!!
> 
> The police box has disappeared!
> 
> I know i am looking at it. He's.. he's real!!
> 
> Quite! Now that we have that established i need your help!
> 
> Fine! What can i help you with and for my fee I ask simply to study you a bit. maybe take a blood sample and..
> 
> I'm looking for a Doctor Molly Hooper do you know her by chance?
> 
> Yes, in the biblical sense..'
> 
> In every way possible known to mankind.

 The Pathologist has joined the chat.

 

 

>  What do you need? This is Doctor Molly Hooper.. By the way big fan of your work sir!
> 
> Thank you and i of yours. i was told you were working on one Harold Saxon?
> 
>  That is classified and not for discussion in a public Chat room.
> 
> I am next of kin sorta speak.He's my.. My friend and my nemesis..
> 
>  You can pick your boyfriend up tomorrow after i have had some sleep as i am not feeling well. Time Lord or not i am going to need to see some paperwork. 
> 
> I have the clearance as well as the paperwork. I also know that due to your condition you are not feeling well.
> 
>  My condition how did you??
> 
> Time Lord..
> 
> Wait a minute! What condition?? I mean you don't have some strange alien disease or something do you??
> 
> No John she is with child obviously.
> 
> Our child.
> 
>  I'm not.. Pregnant, I can;t be we were very careful! I am on the pill and..
> 
> Congratulations! Now about my friend??
> 
> I think you've shocked her as she is just staring at the screen right now..
> 
> I'm on my way, please don't do anything rash I'm going to the cab now..
> 
> Fantastic! Will see you lot in person. Come along for the ride James?
> 
> Damn right I will.

 

The Consulting Detective has signed out

The Doctor gas signed out

Mr Sex has signed out.

 

The British Government has Joined the chat.

 

 

> This chat room will immediately be closed and erased to preserve the utmost secrecy.

John H Watson has signed out.

Mary M has signed out.

 The Pathologist has signed out.

 

 The British Government has signed out.

 

**Chat room has been deleted..**


	3. Chapter 3

[  ](http://s290.photobucket.com/user/DraconusMalfoy/media/collage_zpsqxv6nzjp.jpg.html)

 

John H Watson has started a chat room

Consulting Detective has joined the chat

 

 

>   John.. SH
> 
> We need to talk about what happened Sherlock!

Mr Sex has joined the chat

 

 

>   What is the point Molly isn't talking to either of us!! SH
> 
> Obviously she's still quite angry with us Sherl. JM
> 
>  I know!! I don't understand why she's mad at me!! SH
> 
> You really don't know??
> 
>  Absolutely no idea. SH
> 
> I can't eat or sleep and it's annoying me!! JM
> 
> You know your both shit at relationships!!
> 
>  Thus why we need your help John!!! SH
> 
> It's not as we forgot something important like her birthday or our anniversary or even Toby's birthday. SH
> 
> You forgot Valentines day! I mean for a woman that's.. wait hold on you know Toby's birthday??
> 
> August 12th. Valentines day is not a special day at all. I mean it's a stupid holiday designed for people to spend money to show someone you care about them. It's utter bullocks! Doesn't she know how much I.. How much we care about her everyday?? SH
> 
> It's just what people do. I mean sure it's more commercial and such but I'm pretty sure Molly just wanted to be acknowledged at least.
> 
> Molly knows how I feel about her. As well as how James does too. I don't know why she is mad after all she knows!!!! SH
> 
> How do you feel about Molly Hooper? Because it's not obvious to me at all Sherlock.
> 
> I love her John, we both do and I don't see why one day a year is so important when she should be shown love everyday?? SH
> 
> We both love her very much and I get it Dr. Watson. I do, but I wasn't even in the country and it wasn't my fault!!! JM
> 
> You will be home tonight though won't you James? SH
> 
> Yes, I would have been back last night but then one of your brothers asinine mi6 incompetents ended up compromising the plan. Fucking wanker almost got me killed! Ruined my favorite Gieves & Hawkes suit even. JM
> 
> Well not every one shops on Saville Row you know??
> 
> That is true, not everyone can wear a bespoke suit and look good in it. Especially not like myself or Sherly. JM
> 
> The blue one with the pinstripes I assume? SH
> 
> You know it was, the waistcoat is absolutely ruined as is the jacket. The trousers are torn and you know how much i hate getting my hands dirty. JM
> 
> Yes, as much as Mycroft hates doing legwork. Speaking of Mycroft and Lestrade they will be arriving tomorrow evening from their sex holiday. SH
> 
> Well speaking of weddings..
> 
> Boring affairs where you have to be nice and have all those fancy doilies things and it's just not important. SH
> 
> I asked Mary to marry me.I was hoping that you being my best friend you'd be my best man..
> 
> I don't know this is so sudden! I'll have to see if my schedule allows... JM
> 
> I was talking to Sherlock you tit! I don't even like you Moriarty!!!!
> 
> What? Oh sure i suppose that would be alright. SH
> 
> *Pouts* Honey he doesn't like me! JM
> 
> I don't like you most days myself James. SH
> 
> You love me honey we both know it! JM
> 
> You love him Sherlock?!?!?
> 
> Why are you surprised John, we engage in sexual intercourse and have been in a relationship for seven months now.. SH
> 
> Obviously John, as my best friend you should know that is true. SH
> 
> Sebastian knows how much i love you Sherlock. JM
> 
> He is your minion not your best friend. SH
> 
> Molly knows it as well. JM
> 
> Where does poor Molly fit into this then?
> 
> For us it’s not about dating a bunch of people or having sex with a bunch of people. This is a very deep relationship. I think we have the potentiality to love more than one person. Molly happens to be that one who makes us complete. JM
> 
> In terms of my relationship, my dynamic with James and Molly, there isn’t any sense of jealousy. There’s just a sense of wholeness John.SH
> 
> Regardless have either of you told her how you feel? Out loud at all even once??
> 
> Ordinary people are so adorable. Of course doofus! JM
> 
> James! Shut up will you and stop insulting John.He does have a slightly higher IQ than most normal people. SH
> 
> Thank you Sherlock.
> 
> However please do shut up John. Obviously she knows we care about her. SH
> 
> Have you ever told her while you weren't shagging?
> 
> No,I mean we show her but have we said the words Sherl? JM
> 
> No, not in words but she knows. SH

The Pathologist has joined the chat.

 

 

>   Kitten please talk to me!! JM
> 
>  Hello John. How is Mary?
> 
> She's good we are getting married. She said yes.
> 
> That is great John!!
> 
> Forgive me kitten please?? JM
> 
> You know this is childish!! Why do you need confirmation on February 14th to know how we feel about you?? SH
> 
> How do you feel about me Sherlock? James?
> 
> I... Molly i am not good with sentiment as you know. Can't you tell how I feel about you?? Can't you feel it when we have sexual intercourse? SH
> 
> We adore you, your our girlfriend of course we care deeply for you. JM
> 
> Still drawing a blank sorry but you have to do better than that. 
> 
> You want me to tell you exactly what i feel right now in this chat room?? What you mean to me?? SH
> 
> Yes, i do. What am I to you?
> 
> You are my friend, my Pathologist, one of my lovers, my comfort and my strength and moral compass. You are you and the one that has always mattered most to me. The one who counts the most. Between both you and James you make me whole and I love you Molly Hooper even if you don't understand it it's true. SH
> 
> That was well said Sherlock.
> 
> Wow, I have to think about.. Sherlock do you really mean it?  
>  Open your front door and find out. Even if you don't want to open the door look through the peephole. SH
> 
> We've both got a question for you kitten.
> 
> What?!?!
> 
> Open the door and find out. Either way please open your door I have to use the toilet. JM
> 
> Jim! Even i know that is not how you are suppose to act when you are proposing to your girlfriend! SH
> 
> No shit Sherlock but I have to water the daisies as it is..Also wash off the blood stains on my hands. JM
> 
> Water the daisies?!?!?? Did you just say you needed to water the daisies?
> 
> Yes, problem with that? I am trying to be delicate here and not just blurt out i need to pee okay? Got it Dr. watson?? JM
> 
> Oh I got it in one, just clarifying. My Grand mum used to say she would water the daisies.. Wait I thought you were elsewhere and blood stains?
> 
> This is why I told you to go before we got here James! SH
> 
> I did Sherly. But i have to go again as we've been sitting here over an hour. It's your fault! JM
> 
> i promised I wouldn't pick her locks anymore. SH
> 
> I've got my period and I am grumpy and bloated! Also thank you for not picking my lock and James you should come in before you pee or bleed on the floor. Sherlock i love you too. The rings are both beautiful but I can't accept right now. I mean i can't marry you both can I?
> 
> Molly??
> 
> Sherlock??
> 
> Moriarty?? Anyone??

  Mr Sex has signed out.

Consulting Detective has signed out.

The Pathologist has signed out.

 

 

> Well fuck me then. I'm not staying here with no one to talk to!!

Phillip Anderson has joined the chat

 

 

> Hi !

  John H Watson has signed out.

 

 

> Was it something I said?!?!?!?

  Phillip Anderson has signed out.


	4. April Fools Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's April 1st. You know what that means.... Tomfoolery!!! Join us in the chatroom for some interesting conversation.

 

 

 

[ ](http://s290.photobucket.com/user/DraconusMalfoy/media/collage_zpsqxv6nzjp.jpg.html)

* * *

 

The Pathologist has joined the chat

 Consulting Detective has joined the chat.

  Mr Sex has joined the chat

 

 

 

> I am so nervous to tell them.
> 
> Honey bee it'll be okay I promise. SH
> 
>   Yes Kitten if they don't like our news then fuck em. Who cares what anyone other than we three feel about it really? JM
> 
>   It might make my brother upset but anything that does that is good. SH
> 
>  Well if your big brother doesn't like it, i'll blow up his favorite bakery. JM
> 
> i love it when your all big and bad but no blowing up the bakers.!
> 
> Fine! Yes dear the Bakery is safe.Won't blow it up but won't stop me from threatening it if he makes me angry. JM

John H Watson has joined the chat

Silver Fox has joined the chat

The British Government has joined the chat

Mary M has joined the chat

 

 

 

> Hi thank you all for coming. I have some news, that is Sherlock, James and I do.
> 
> **Grins** Though for the record I proposed we tell them in person. SH
> 
> Would you prefer we left the bedroom,got dressed and went to tell each of them in person Sherl? JM
> 
>  No, carry on then. SH
> 
> You know I am a busy man,whatever it is please be quick about it! MH
> 
> You and Greg are on your sex holiday! SH
> 
> The name is GREG!!!
> 
> Obviously it is. Care to re read my statement Lestrade. SH
> 
> Quite right, sorry just you do it all the time. Butcher my name and it's Lestrade Holmes now thank you very much!
> 
> Regardless when are you getting home? The yard is utterly incompetent without you here!!! SH
> 
> Envious brother mine?? MH
> 
> **Rolls eyes ** JM
> 
> Really! Not here and not now! Molly you were saying something?
> 
> Ummm now I am not so sure i mean what if you don't take the news well??
> 
> Just spill Molls.
> 
> Well...
> 
> Why don't you just tell everyone your pregnant and get on with it Miss Hooper??? MH

The Pathologist has logged out.

 

 

 

> Kitten? JM
> 
> Honey bee? Oh just great Mycroft!!! SH

> Damn it Mycroft!!! Now she's crying her eyes out!!! SH
> 
> Mycroft you arsehole!!!! I swear if we weren't married Sherl I would strap your brother full of Semtex and.. You know that little cake shop you like so much Mycroft?!?! It's going to be blown up! JM
> 
> Married?!?!?!? What no not my cake!!!! MH
> 
> Yes married... No you can't blow up the cake shop Molly enjoys their cakes too.You promised her. As or myself,I really don't care I will even help you if you wish it Jimmy. SH
> 
> Hand-fasted to be technical but married all the same. Fine Sherl the things I do for love and to keep my spouses happy.. oh you want to give me a hand.. SH
> 
> Congratulations!!
> 
> Hand-fasted is that legal?
> 
> Mycroft what have I told you about being so blunt??
> 
> It is in Wiccan circles but not by Governmental ones.
> 
> It is in Ireland and Scotland and most of the world. JM
> 
> I apologize. Please let Miss Hooper know I am sorry to have assumed. MH

 The Pathologist has joined the chat.

 

 

 

>  MYCROFT BLOODY FUCKING HOLMES!!!!!!!
> 
> Ummmm SH
> 
> Someone's in trouble!! JM
> 
> I apologize sincerely Miss Hooper.MH
> 
>  That would be DOCTOR Moriarty Holmes to you!!!!
> 
> I'm sorry... Please forgive me Molly. MH
> 
>  Just for that we are not naming the baby after you!!!!!
> 
> Molly?? SH
> 
> Kitten?? Really? We're... JM
> 
>  Yes alright yes I'm pregnant. i just wanted to tell you differently but your big brothers big mouth...
> 
> A baby? We're.... You and me and Jim are..(Has fainted outside the chat room.) SH
> 
> I'm happy and Sherlock has fainted. JM
> 
> Congratulations!! Though I think you went too far with the gag..
> 
> Oh no don't tell me!
> 
> Yeah some April fools gag as it made my husband faint. Poor Sherlock. But I just took a pregnancy test so it might be true.
> 
> I do not faint and that was not funny Molly!! SH
> 
> So you don't faint Sherlock Holmes??
> 
> No, he stumbled and hit his head on the coffee table. My absolutely favorite Derek Rose Brindisi silk dressing gown is now ruined! JM
> 
> Is sherlock okay Molls? What are you going on about Moriarty??
> 
> Please call me James I mean we are family now. Oh when Sherlock fell down I went over to him and poor Sherly's forehead in scratched and bleeding a little bit.. The blood stains are always a bitch to get out but especially in silk. It's ruined Kitten!!! JM
> 
> Not like you don't have a dozen or more James!!! Sherlock is fine John.Just a scrape really doesn't even need stitches.
> 
> True but I like to look good and feel comfortable as you know for you and Sherl. i could walk around naked but we'd never leave the flat if I did so. JM
> 
> You can use one of mine until we go shopping love.But not until after our own sex holiday.Oh do walk around naked!! SH
> 
> So it was a gag your not pregnant but you are married? Ummm naked Moriarty is not a pleasant thought.
> 
> It is a pleasant sight but for mine and Molly's eyes only.. SH
> 
> It seems yes, they were and I assume congratulations is in order. Do however be kind to send me the bill James as I will replace what my brother has destroyed as soon as it is available for me to do so.
> 
> No need my husband will buy me one. He owes me another as the last one ripped when we were..JM
> 
> If you weren't playing hard to get it wouldn't have happened. Though it does make a good blindfold and restraint now..SH
> 
>  Well I took the pregnancy test to be sure...
> 
> So we're really having a baby? JM
> 
> A baby honey bee? SH
> 
>  Yes? I mean I am pregnant.
> 
> I love you Molly Hooper Moriarty Holmes!!!! SH
> 
> Likewise! So we're going to have a little consultant running around.. JM
> 
> A mini version of Molly would satisfy me greatly. But male offspring does run in my family line. SH
> 
>  **Grins*** I love you men so much!!
> 
> Congratulations!!!!
> 
> Me an uncle? Why that means I was right!
> 
>  Yes okay you were right, but we are still not naming the baby after you!
> 
> He will be named after me. :) JM
> 
> No, after me. His name will be William. SH
> 
> Congratulations!! What if it's a girl though??
> 
> Willow? JM
> 
> Why not just use James as a middle name as-is? SH
> 
>  I always liked the name Artemis though.. For a girl or boy even.
> 
> Artemis.. Artemis Moriarty Holmes.. SH
> 
>    Willow Artemis James Moriarty Holmes sound pretty. JM
> 
>   I really like that and perhaps if it's a boy it could be William Artemis James Moriarty Holmes ?
> 
> Twins run in my family line so it's possible it could be both. JM
> 
> Twins also run in the Holmes family line as well. Quite frequently actually.
> 
>  I think we have time to think about it. But I am named for two of my great aunts who were identical twins. Margaret and Louise.
> 
> Does it skip a generation because your nor James are twins Sherlock.
> 
> Actually I have or had a twin brother,he died years ago. His name was Sherrinford. He and I were not identical twins.SH
> 
> My twin died at birth and I really don't know much except he was called Jude. JM
> 
> Oh sweethearts!!!! Okay so in that case I can assume it's very possible there will be twins.
> 
> So who do you think is the biological father?
> 
> It's quite possible that we both are biologically but also we both are it's fathers as we are married to their or it's mother.SH
> 
> As long as the baby is healthy does it really matter? JM
> 
> Come in for a wellness check up when you get back from your Honeymoon Molly.
> 
> Can we accompany our wife to the appointment?SH
> 
> Is it too soon for the baby to be seen on that machine thing, an ultrasound? JM
> 
> I am not sure, Perhaps depends on how far Molly is and if it's actually positive. Sometimes those tests can have false positives as well as false negatives.
> 
> So you are saying that it might be a false reading? SH
> 
> What no that is not acceptable! JM
> 
> I propose we up the odds in our favor.  SH
> 
> Pardon us. JM
> 
> Oh... Ok bye everyone !

The Pathologist has logged out.

 Consulting Detective has logged out.

  Mr Sex has logged out.

 

 

>  
> 
> I suppose we shall leave you then. Come along Gregory my love..
> 
> I'll take that as a promise. John,Mary it was good to see you. Later!

Silver Fox has logged out

The British Government has logged out.

 

 

>  
> 
> So dinner tonight sweetheart??
> 
> Yes, pick me up at 7 <3
> 
> See you soon sweetheart.

John H Watson has logged out

Mary M has logged out

 

 


	5. Chapter 5

                                                                       

 Consulting Detective has joined the chat.

John H Watson has joined the chat

 

> I don't know what to do John. SH
> 
> What is the matter Sherlock?
> 
> I don't know! That's the problem!!!! SH
> 
> Tell me what happened.
> 
> Molly and James keep whispering and won't tell me why! SH
> 
> I don't get why they are mad at me???? SH
> 
> Did you by chance say or do something a bit of no good??
> 
> No! I hadn't even woke up fully the first time I noticed when I am in the same room with them and laughing. What am I missing John??? SH
> 
> I have no idea.
> 
> You're no help at all John!! SH

Silver Fox has joined the chat

 

 

> Sherlock what in the world?
> 
> I need your help! SH
> 
> What's wrong?
> 
> I don't know! That's the problem!!!! SH 
> 
> I have no idea either but it seems that Moriarty and Molly are keeping something from Sherlock.
> 
> Have you asked them??
> 
> Obviously. SH
> 
> Then why are they??
> 
> I don't know!!!! They just keep whispering and laughing!!! SH
> 
> I think they don't love me anymore!! SH

The British Government has joined the chat

 

 

> Sherlock what day is it today?? MH
> 
> January 6th. SH
> 
> Oh I get it.
> 
> I do too.
> 
> Yes! But I do not see where that is relevant to why they are hurting me! SH
> 
> Think back brother mine.. What is on January 6th? MH
> 
> I don't know! Obviously it's something not relevant where I have kept it in my Mind Palace!!!! SH

The Pathologist has joined the chat

Mr Sex has joined the chat

 

 

> Sherlock please come out of the closet!!!!
> 
> Normally I would quip we have both been out of the closet for ages honey, but really please come out Sherly.JM
> 
> Go away! SH
> 
> For God sake Sherlock!!! Come out of that closet!! MH
> 
> Why should I? SH
> 
> Sherly please come out. JM
> 
> Please come out sweetheart.
> 
> Don't make me have to come in there William Sherlock Scott Holmes!!! JM
> 
> Why do you care? You can tell me you don't love me anymore from right here!! SH
> 
> What??
> 
>  
> 
> Explain Sherlock. JM
> 
> What makes you think we don't love you? JM
> 
> This is ridiculous look today is.... MH

The British Government has been kicked out of the chatroom.

 

> WHY DID YOU KICK ME OUT OF THE CHAT ROOM JAMES?!?!?! MH
> 
> Sorry but you can't tell him Mycroft! JM
> 
> Fine! MH
> 
> If I come out will you tell me?SH
> 
> No JM
> 
> It would ruin the surprise honey. JM
> 
> What if I persuaded you?SH
> 
> Enlighten me how would you persuade me?. JM
> 
> (Says something offline)
> 
> Hmmm very tempting but you'd have to come out of the closet to do that... JM
> 
> Damn! SH
> 
> If I tell you it'll ruin the surprise.. JM

Anderson has logged on.

>   Happy Birthday Sherlock.
> 
> Thank you Anderson. At least someone has wished me a Happy Birthday. It seems my loved ones have forgotten to.. Ohh...  SH
> 
> WTF Anderson?? You will be made into shoes!!!?? JM
> 
> *****
> 
> God Phillip way to ruin a surprise!!
> 
> Damn, you knew all along you bastard!!!
> 
> Obviously but I never assumed you'd be talking about my birthday as it is public knowledge it's on the web site after all! SH

John H Watson has left the chat

Silver Fox has left the chat

The Pathologist has left the chat

Mr Sex has left the chat

> I promise my husband won't turn you into shoes but you might want to stay away from NSY, Bart's and  Baker street for at least a week.SH

 Consulting Detective has left the chat.

> Damn and I bought him a gift and everything too!

 


	6. Chapter 6

                                                                                 

 

Consulting Detective has joined the chat

Mr Sex has joined the chat

 

> James I want, no need to tell you something. SH
> 
> You're just in the next room,why can't you tell me face to face? JM
> 
> It's bad isn't it Sherly?? JM
> 
> Let me guess you have realized you can't be with me anymore right?? JM
> 
> Look I know I'm not perfect but i assumed you know that I love you and once we made our vows to each other I meant them and am trying hard to be a better person. JM
> 
> I love you James Andrew Moriarty. There I finally can say it. SH
> 
> ...... JM
> 
> Jim?? SH

Mr sex has logged out of the chat room.(James puts on his coat and leaves the flat.) JM

The Pathologist has joined the chat

 

>   Jim?? What the Fuck?
> 
> Hello love. Where is Jim? I thought I'd talk to both of you??
> 
> Hello honeybee, he was here but I think he's a bit angry with me. SH
> 
> Oh Sherl, I am sure whatever it is we'll work it out together.
> 
> What happened?
> 
> I told him, I finally said it and he left the flat! SH
> 
> (Has gone up and read the previous chat posts and then texts back) Well, I am sure he's mad because you said it in a chat room from the other room and you're both in the same flat,or were.
> 
> Why would that make him mad? SH
> 
> well you know how sensitive he can be sometimes. The first time is usually said in person as well.
> 
> But why should it mean more if I said it in person than text it? I mean as long as i say it and feel it why should that matter? SH

  Mr Sex has joined the chat

 

> Hello kitten. Sherlock..JM
> 
> Hi Jim<3
> 
> When will you be home??JM
> 
> In three days. The conference is rather interesting though!
> 
> Good, i miss you. JM
> 
> James come home.SH
> 
> Why? JM
> 
> Because I want to tell you and show you how much i love you..SH
> 
> You think I'm upset because you told me in a chat room via a text?  JM
> 
> Aren't you? SH
> 
> No, I'm not. JM
> 
> Then you're not angry with me? SH
> 
> I am but not because you told me in the chat room, it was more than that.  JM
> 
> Come home and we can talk about it. SH
> 
> Please?!? SH
> 
> You really have no idea do you Sherlock?? JM
> 
> You made me think you didn't love me anymore. So I am down at the pub getting pissed.JM
> 
> Driving really isn't such a good idea right now. JM
> 
> Would you like me to come get you is that it love? SH
> 
> Fuck you!. JM
> 
> Which pub are you in Jim?
> 
> The Fox and Goose. Remember we went there on our first date? JM
> 
> Oh that's very nice! We should go there when i come home.

Consulting Detective has left the chat

 

> Damn he's here.. JM
> 
> Good, go home..
> 
> Not Sherlock, Mycroft and he's not too happy to see me. JM
> 
> What did you do?
> 
> I punched him in the nose and told him his brother was an idiot. Now Sherlockis here and they are arguing and i just want to go home and cry. JM
> 
> I think I'm drunk kitten JM
> 
> Everything looks so funny! JM
> 
> What do you see and why do you say that?
> 
> Well Sherlock's arse as he has lifted me up and is carrying me. I feel like i"m flying! JM
> 
> I am taking Jim home and chaining him to our bed and not letting him leave our flat until you come home. I took his phone from him so don't worry honeybee, he's safe and is going to hurt like hell in the morning.SH

Mr sex has logged out of the chat room

> Well I guess I should log off as i am talking to myself.

The Pathologist has logged out of the chat room

>  


	7. Chapter 7

                                                                                     

**Molly is currently at a conference in  Switzerland and the boys and her are chatting.  
**

**This is set the next afternoon after the previous chat room log. They are in voice chat this time.**

Consulting Detective has joined the chat

The Pathologist has joined the chat

Mr Sex has joined the chat

>  Hello Honeybee
> 
> I miss you kitten sorry about yesterday.
> 
> I miss you both too. It's alright Jim really you don't have to apologize to me.
> 
> Actually he does as he did something not so good last night.
> 
> Well if you hadn't been such a prick I wouldn't have thrown up all over the bedroom carpet now would I?
> 
> Oh dear! Are you feeling better now though? **  
> **
> 
> I do but for an entirely different reason. **  
> **
> 
>   I am sporting a rather prominent erection right now. **  
> **
> 
> Who knew you had such a kink?  
>  What is going on there??
> 
> I've handcuffed him to the bed and he can't move.
> 
> Sherlock why is Jim handcuffed to the bed??
> 
> Because i told him I was going to. Remember what he did last night?
> 
> Sherlock you should un cuff Jim right now what you both did was not good.
> 
>   I don't mind it really except that Sheryl is fully dressed and i am not.
> 
>   He's wearing his purple sexy shirt too which is making this so much harder..
> 
> Should I let you up James Hmmm?
> 
>   Let me up or fuck me. Those are your options.
> 
> Or I could just leave you like this for a bit...
> 
>   Oh my god Jesus don't leave the room!
> 
>   Come back here right now and uncuff me you Arse!
> 
> Jim are you alright?
> 
> I don't know what if he doesn't come back?
> 
> Oh... oh damn.. yes like that Honey please!
> 
> Jim?
> 
> Yes... oh that feels so fucking good!
> 
> That's it fuck me Sherly, fuck me hard you cock slut!
> 
> Who is the cock slut?
> 
> I am now give it to me!
> 
> Fuck!
> 
> At least uncuff me first!
> 
> Jim?
> 
> I wish you were here right now Kitten..
> 
> I do too but I will be home soon.
> 
> I should video this and send it to you honeybee!
> 
> Or, we can do this for her in person and she can share in the fun..
> 
> Yes.
> 
> Kitten go answer the door would you please pet?
> 
> How did you? What are you doing here???
> 
> Mycroft's private jet, I borrowed it for the weekend.
> 
> We figured we never got the official honeymoon so here we are.
> 
> Oh and i brought the handcuffs...

The British Government has entered the chat

The Pathologist has left the chat

Mr Sex has left the chat

 

> WILLIAM SHERLOCK SCOTT HOLMES, YOU BRING MY PRIVATE JET RIGHT NOW!!!!!
> 
> Nope don't think so Fatty!!!!

Consulting Detective has left the chat

 

> Fuck!


	8. Chapter 8

 

 

 

[ ](http://s290.photobucket.com/user/DraconusMalfoy/media/collage_zpsqxv6nzjp.jpg.html)

 

 

* * *

 

Consulting Detective has joined the chat

The Pathologist has joined the chat

Mr. Sex has joined the chat

 

 

>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Hello Loves :)
> 
>  How are things going on in Dublin?
> 
>  They are progressing nicely. I would rather I was home with you kitten and you too Sherly.
> 
> James, it is impearative you finish up whatever work my brother has you doing and come home as soon as possible.
> 
>  I am doing my best Sheryl really I am. Do you think I want to be away from our wife right now?? She could give birth anytime and here I am stuck in Dublin having to listen to a bunch of morons!
> 
> Now please don't fight! Just come home as soon as you can Jim I am fine and not due for another few days. 
> 
>  I'm sorry Kitten. I will try to be home very soon. 
> 
>  I know. As it is Sherlock is taking good care of us and be careful! Don't do anything rash!
> 
>  I won't I promise I will be safe. 

  Mr. Sex has Logged Off

 

>    James!
> 
>  Oh God!
> 
>  I'm sure he's fine. Maybe he hit a dead zone and it logged him off. 

 Sebastian has joined the chatroom

 

 

>   Jim's been shot. Luckily it hit his phone but it is busted. Boss says to tell you he's fine and will be home soon. 
> 
>  Oh Thank God! OH!!! My water just broke!
> 
>  Don't have the baby without me! I'll be there soon Kitten, Sheryl. They broke my phone but that does not matter I am taking Sebastian's for now.
> 
>  I've called Mycroft and he's sending you and Seb as fast as he can. In the Cab, on route to Bart's 
> 
>  I love you both. Take good of our Kitten Sheryl. The chopper is here. Be there soon. I'm going to have to log off.

 Sebastian has Logged off.

* * *

 

At St. Bart's Hospital Maternity ward. (Outside chatroom.)

* * *

 

Molly has arrived at the hospital and she is taken to the Maternity ward with Sherlock and he is holding her hand they await James. Molly is feeling horrible as the contractions are coming closer and closer to each other. She is almost fully dilated and effaced as James comes running in and he looks freaked out. His hair is a mess and there is blood on his shirt but he arrives and slumps down in a chair on the opposite side of Molly in the bed and takes her other hand. 

  I'm here baby, I'm here. 

I told you to be safe!

 I was. I didn't even do anything to piss them off. 

 That is true he was finishing the negotiation when a man came in and started shooting people up.Luckily Jim was wearing a kevlar vest. 

 Still, hurts like hell when you're shot in the chest. 

I will be having a nasty talk with Mycroft later. This is unacceptable! 

(Molly lets out a scream and puts a lot of pressure on both James and Sherlock's hands.) 

 I am not letting you touch me again! This hurts, oh god it hurts! I hate you both! you want to talk about pain and hurt!

 It's okay Kitten, squeeze my hand. break it if you need to. I'm sorry this is so painful to you. Can't they give you something for pain?

My hand also you may break Molly. No, she's effaced and ready and giving her medication now would not help. Bear down and push when you're ready. Where is the damn doctor! I'm going to go get him and drag him back here...

Oh no, you don't William Sherlock Scott Holmes! (Squeezes and break two of Sherlock's fingers.)

 I will go find someone. 

Sebastian goes to find a nurse to send for the doctor and he winces as he has heard both Sherlock and James fingers break and crunch. As he is looking for the nurse, Mycroft is sitting in the lobby waiting room with Greg and John and Mary has just arrived. 

 Are you Doctor Watson? I can't find the bosses wife's doctor and she's ready to pop. I know she's broken at least two of both Holmes fingers as well as Jim's can you come help, please?

  Yes, I'm doctor Watson. Let me go see what I can do. 

 Thank you, Mr. Moran, I am sure that my brother and his spouses are in good hands with John Watson. 

 Thank you, Dr.watson and I assure you Mr. Holmes, other than perhaps a few broken fingers both your brother and James are fine for the moment. 

* * *

Back in the room with Sherlock,James and Molly.

* * *

 

  You're doing well kitten. Do you want some of these ice chips?

 I don't want any fucking ice!! You did this to me! Both of you I hate you both right now!

 If I could trade places with you I would honeybee. i know it hurts and your so strong to endure this. 

 I can't do this! i need drugs! Where is the damn doctor?!?

Hey I couldn't seem to find your regular doctor but came to see what i can do. 

  Get this baby out of me!! That's what you can do john!!! 

 It's been a while since i attended a birth but I can check if your ready and effaced. 

John moves over and begins to examine molly when Sherlock gives him a hard look as well as james does. 

 What are you doing john?

 Why are you looking at Molly's privates? They are private for a reason!

 Aren't you married and isn't that cheating. i am so telling your wife!

 Both of you shut it! he is just examining me not having sex with me. John is just trying to help and oh god here comes another contraction!

Well you are effaced and the baby has dropped. You are beginning to crown and I need to put on some scrubs. To be sterile of course. Don't push yet Molly. Be back in a tick!

 Try to relax we will have our baby soon. Jim, can you see anything?

 Not really, there is some hair but it's reddish. Our baby is going to be a ginger. that's lovely!  Wait Sebastian come stand up here i don't want you looking down at Molly when she does this. As it is i don't like the bloody doctor doing it. If I knew about how to do this, we would have preferred a home birth!

  Really boss I really don't want to see your missus giving birth. Mind if i go back to the waiting room?

  I'm going to push it's coming I can't wait anymore! Fuck! One of you get down there he's coming!

 Go Seb, the baby will be born soon. Okay kitten. allow me to.. Oh god it's happening.. what do I do Molls? 

  When he is out, place him on my chest, the doctor can do the rest. 

There is a scream and the baby is delivered as there is silence Molly looks worried. however as James lifts the baby and is careful the cord is not compressed, the baby cries out and he places his son on his mother's chest. 

Alright we need to cut the cord and..

Molly screams and john then blushes a moment. He looks up at Molly in surprise.

I suppose we need to make room for his sibling...

 What do you mean? TWINS?!?

I mean what i said. Let's cut the cord on your son and then bring his sibling into the world Molly. Your doing splendidly!

 Get it out! GET IT OUT!!!!!!

Molly is crying but then looks at her son and tries to relax. She sees both Sherlock and James crying. Their son's cord is cut and a nurse comes in to clean up the little boy. Ten minutes later, their daughter is born and both men are really emotional as they look down now at both children who have been cleaned and dressed and laying on molly's chest .

John decides to leave the new family alone and goes back to the waiting room. He is smiling as the others look at him in question. 

It's twins, both healthy,mum and daddies are relaxing now. Did anyone ever find the doctor? 

Their doctor was a lout and incompetent. I fired him and I am pleased tell me what gender are my brother's children?

One of each. Both a ten rating on the scale and congratulations i suppose to us.. 

 

Back in the room the trio are looking down at their babies and smiling and crying. All are happy and Molly finally looks at her two men and blushes a moment. 

 I love you, god they are perfect and beautiful! How does each of your hands feel? I think i may have broken your hands!

 Perhaps a finger or two not too much damage. I will have it looked at in a bit. I love you too and them and James.

 Have you decided on the names love? Also yes my hand hurts but is nothing compared to your pain a bit ago. I love you and this is incredible!

 Gentleman i would like you to meet William James Mycroft John Moriarty-Holmes and Miranda Artemis Violet Mary Moriarty-Holmes.

At this declaration both children opened their eyes and looked at their fathers. Will had brown eyes and Miranda's eyes were blue like Sherlock's. All were overjoyed. 

 

* * *


	9. Chapter 9

 

 

 

[ ](http://s290.photobucket.com/user/DraconusMalfoy/media/collage_zpsqxv6nzjp.jpg.html)

Silver Fox has joined the chat

The British Government has joined the chat 

 

> I miss you Gregory
> 
> Miss you too Myc. How much longer do you think the talks are going to take?
> 
> Another day or so sadly. I hate being away from you. 
> 
> I don't like it either but it's work and I understand. 
> 
> You're too good to me Gregory. I don't know how you can be so patient to put up with it all.
> 
> Years of practice with Sherlock but truthfully, I understand and knew what I was signing up for when we were married. Hell even before we began dating I knew there would be times where we would be apart. My job isn't always close to home as I am off at times myself.
> 
> Regardless my darling, when I come home I am taking some time off for us. I believe that what is the phrase..? All work and no play makes Mycroft a dull boy?
> 
> Something like that, however my sexy young man you are anything but boring. 

 Consulting Detective has joined the chat. 

 

> Regardless how that pleases me I am happy to oblige my sexy old man as much as he pleases..
> 
> I think I have a few ideas.. I do have handcuffs after all and we could always use one of your ties too..
> 
> Excuse me but could you please not brag your sexual preferences in my presence? As it is this chat room is suppose to be for potential clients not so you can flirt..
> 
> You are just envious as it seems James has not contacted you since he and I made this trip to the America's?
> 
> Truth is we aren't doing anything you have not do so with James or Molly or both. I know I miss Mycroft and you miss James but don't sulk! It's alright to be worried.
> 
> I am not worried about James nor am I missing him! He can stay away for all I care as it means I get to be alone more with Molly and our children!

Mr Sex has joined the chat 

 

>  Do you miss me? 
> 
> I just saw you five minutes ago, however as my brother was saying he doesn't..
> 
> Shut up Mycroft!!! Jim, please come home soon! 
> 
>  I will when I can Sheryl! Kiss our lovely wife for me and our beautiful children, I miss you and them so much.I know your trying not to admit it but you miss me too,I know you do. 
> 
> Yes, I admit it. Molly is at work and the children are asleep. I am laying in our cold bed wishing you were here to warm me up. 
> 
>  I will soon. I know Molly was going back to work,but I thought that wasn't until Wednesday?
> 
> It is Wednesday here now and she asked for the night shift. I sent you a picture earlier did you get it darling?
> 
>  I did I miss you all three. How is it possible they have gotten bigger so fast I have only been gone two days?
> 
>  They are asleep and they have gained a pound each. Molly says she will come on here at her break that's why I logged on other than to talk to you about this and the other thing we discussed a week ago.
> 
> They are beautiful! Again congrats and if you need any alone time please feel free to let me know I don't mind babysitting. 
> 
> William and Miranda really are growing up. Gregory and I would be delighted to child mind sometime. 

The Pathologist has joined the chat  

 

> Hello loves <3 Hi Mycroft,Greg. 
> 
>  Miss you Kitten do you miss me?
> 
> Of course! Though we've been very busy haven't we Sherlock? 
> 
>  Yes, busy. That reminds me, Greg and Mycroft have offered to child mind. Care to go out tomorrow night for dinner Molly?
> 
>  We have reservations for us at Alain Ducasse at the Dorchester hotel. I figured we both need a break as well as have booked the Harlequin Penthouse for the night. James and I wanted to surprise you for your birthday.
> 
> That sounds lovely but really we should be smarter with our money Sherlock!
> 
>  Anything for you Kitten. It's your Birthday tomorrow and we booked this a month ago. Sadly I wont be there but you both have a wonderful time. Have some champagne for me. 
> 
> I can't drink champagne I am nursing but will have a lovely time and we could do it again sometime else right?
> 
>  Of course my love. Whenever your heart desires. 
> 
> I could babysit I mean I don't have anything to do and I am off tomorrow. It has been years since I child minded as you know Amanda is now nineteen and in college. 
> 
> That's right how is Mandi doing? She's at Oxford right?
> 
> Cambridge actually. I miss her but she is doing good. She called Mycroft and me last week and we Skype she and I every few days. 
> 
> Amanda really is a lovely young woman and is doing well. We have invited her to come to the manor when she has school break.
> 
> I wasn't aware you had a child Greg.
> 
> Yeah, well my ex wife and I had her at a young age and well she lived with Maggie until she was seventeen. Sherlock and Molly are her God parents.
> 
>  Yes yes, that we are. Your point? Oh you wanted to babysit. Alright I have no problem with that as long as you do not take the children out of the manor nor engage in coitus in front of them. Kissing also should be to a minimum.
> 
> Well since Mycroft is not home there will be no shagging or kissing of anyone in front of the children. I planned on relaxing with them and not running all over London. 
> 
>  Molly,Jim,what do you think?
> 
> I am okay with that. Greg wouldn't hurt our children or get them into danger. Unlike my husbands sometimes. 
> 
> I am fine with it and concur Sherlock we need to be more careful ourselves. As it is they have already been to a crime scene or two and to the morgue. Also at MI6 in my office. 
> 
> As well as the Diogenes and Scotland yard. However do know regardless my niece and nephew are protected by the highest level of security. It is on the same level as the Queen mum herself. 
> 
>  I have NEVER put our children in danger!!!!! They always stay outside the crime scene with John or with Donovan. Also you work in the morgue and I was visiting you honeybee so there was no danger then. Also have I not experimented on them or conducted other experiments in other than our lab at home or at St Bart's?
> 
> I know Sherlock, Jim and you're good daddies. I know that you have been good Sherlock and I know you are still in a strop because I went back to work tonight. I know we don't want a nanny but maybe we could..
> 
>  I am not! Not in a strop.  I just.. You and James know of my concerns and reasons. I will not get into this now in a public forum chat room! I do not want our children raised by someone other than you and I and James. What is so wrong with that? I know you want to work and appreciate it in my line of work as your the only competent pathologist and only one I will work with. 
> 
> As it is if Sebastian wasn't there to make sure you were protected I would not allow you to go into that place and be exposed to security risks! Neither would James! 

 Sebastian has joined the chat room

 

>  Excuse me but why is your wife balling her eyes out Holmes? What insensitive thing have you said to her now? She has locked herself in her office but I can hear her. As for why I protect your wife it's more because of Jim and Mycroft as well as my honor to do so as Molly is a nice kind person. 
> 
>  Consulting Detective has gone idle...
> 
> Sherlock? 
> 
> Sherlock answer me!
> 
> Currently my brother is rocking Miranda, James. I know that he means well and am sorry he has upset Molly. Thank you Sebastian for keeping my sister in law safe. 
> 
> I was just going to say that maybe we could have Mrs Hudson watch them sometimes. That or Mary and John as they are their Godparents other than Sebastian and Anthea. The reason I am crying is not because of what Sherlock was saying. 
> 
> Hold on why are you crying Molly? Also Artemis woke up and I am feeding her a bottle. 
> 
> What's wrong Kitten? 
> 
> I am tired and my hormones are all over the place. I miss my children and husbands and also there is a child in the morgue who I just did a post mortem on and she was a baby. I can't help but look at this little child and not think of our children. 
> 
>  Oh Kitten! Daddy will be home soon and I am sure that Sherlock will solve who did this! 
> 
>  I'm sorry I yelled Honeybee. I will do whatever I have to, for this child to be able to rest in peace. 

 Personal Assistant to Brittish Government  has joined the chat room

 

> The jet will be ready in ten sir.
> 
> Very good. I will be home soon Gregory. The talks aren't over but I am no longer needed and James may come as well. 
> 
>   I guess we will be spending your birthday together then. Will be there shortly. Thank you Mycroft. 
> 
> I will be home soon Seb love. 
> 
>  Can't wait to see you beautiful! 
> 
>   Take Molly home Sebastian and then take the weekend off. 
> 
> Very good. I concur, also you have the weekend off Anthea. I will be busy child minding as well as snuggling up with my husband. Go relax my dear you deserve to rest.
> 
>  


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